1. Don’t touch the cat and then eat food.
2. Like a hole in the wall? Like a hole in the wall.
3. Thank you, that’s what I needed to hear you say.
4. It means you’re one of ours.
5. Same corner, same row.
6. Kate thinks her butter is being breaded already.
7. We have to stay on task for world domination. remember
8. We/They made more jobs than Obama did.
9. Love’s not Liesely, Love’s not Weasley. Love’s not easy. I am.
10. Remember when Meg became a Tiger.
11. It’s stuck on there forever. Leave it. It’s done.
12. At least Alyssa has a hot brother.
13. All touch is rape, remember. (All those with my energy)
14. He’s so white he could put blackface on and still look white. Eeeee.
15. Would you still like me if I had these tits and this clit and had __________ (a personality like Kate)?
16. Is it worse than the markup on fanny packs? Nothing was worse than that.
17. The vans of_____ acting.
18. Was it worse it then the time the raccoon got in the copier? Nothing could be worse than that.
19. I feel embarrassed and ashamed, and full of regret, and vulnerable? —That’s not something I’ve ever experienced before in my entire life, sorry I can’t help you with it
20. I happenstanced…
21. Am I like a beanie baby to you?
22. I’m sorry I can’t listen anymore. You’re making my ears cum (its for miss parish)
23. We are the two hottest people in here, we should sit next to each other.
24. Stop talking about things being on cobs!
25. Do you want to get coffee sometime? Are you still boring? Are you still a stupid slut?
26. I’m gonna go masturbate to that picture when it’s not in front of me.
27. None of it matches, but none of it clashes. Like the Molly sandwich.
28. Go ahead and google that, you know I did.
29. Yeah why don’t you put that sentiment in a letter and mail it to her/him.
30. Is it more beautiful than California? Nothing is more beautiful than California.
31. Poor guy, he never really had a father.
32. I need my 1987 DG-20 Casio Electric Guitar, set to…mandolin
33. How dare you walk out of your house and get into a car and drive it
34. How could you ruin my (party)? It was easy, I just (did this thing) and everyone got mad at me. … Oh I’m sorry I thought you asked how DID I ruin your party. And I’m like you were there. How do you not know? you had a front row seat. (When someone asks you how you did something bad,)
35. Moveon.org
36. Sorry, I’m such a slut. Sigh.
37. Freedom hater
38. Sorry I don’t have that Horse Whisperer money.
39. Now that I got that Horse Whisperer money…
40. I am masturbating so hard to you playing me right now.
41. So you have gauche and now I have it.
42. Pumpkin tits.
43. It was cirque de Soleil as fuck.
44. Booya grandma, booyah (Ted/9th)
45. In your face!
46. Uh… I know what I have to do.
47. Todd has a big door on his head anyone can get in there. So does Steve and Adam.
48. My feelings were broken in half and sliced a part and ripped to shreds.
49. Jerk face.
50. Rewind time on THAT.
51. Thanks Logan. What I do? He’s always doing somethin.
52. Not my brother Adam, your cousin Adam. Not my cousin Adam, your brother.
53. Floor (toast)
54. Kate should be dead. That’s what everone said. So instead of killing her, we undretarded her, which killed the whole world, and Hillary Clinton’s presidency and the elite’s plan for world domination.
55. I kiss you/hold your hand to feel the feeling.
56. What are we going to do today? The same thing we do every day, try and take over the world
57. It’s my mind, so you’re mine.
58. Bogart it/you/me and Bond it/you/me
59. Not order them, put them in order. Don’t not put those things in order.
60. Yeah kinda…
61. You like your coffee like I like my men, Bitter and Stupid (black)
62. …No, it’s just cuz we’re the same stupid as you.
63. Nice going, you’re beginning to become a short/long and difficult to spell household name.
64. You’re beginning to become an unpronounceable and unspellerable household not name.
65. Jason just take this- Jason Sudeikis
66. Boy/Girl who is as fat as me, who’s not as fat as me.
67. You look really pretty, prettier than us even.
68. Our moms said we are just too pretty, prettier than you even.
69. It’s a thing you bought with this thing over it.
70. Stop gaslighting me, Shut up, there’s no such thing as gaslighting, you made that up cuz you’re fucking crazy.
71. Shut up, Meg
72. Why don’t you go back to the carpet store roy, where you belong.
73. ::exact sentence talking::
74. She’s office hot
75. Well, I mean, yeah. If you want to go right at it like a Neanderthal, sure
76. You know I don’t believe that. I don’t believe that’s a real conversation when I hear that. People don’t talk like that Erin.
77. He did legends of the fall for me. (About Brad)
78. You Gigi-ed
79. You romo, so you know know
80. Just smokin’ to remember jay cutler exists
81. What if she can sing and dance and skip and I can only roll into a potato?
82. You don’t have all night either. (In response to I don’t have all day) we’re theives in the night.
83. If you think I’m dead, I’m alive. If you think you’re safe, I’m coming for you.
84. What does bilderberg stand for?
85. I can move the comfy chair up.
Catchphrases
