Blah.

I’m trying to heal aspects of our relationship, and make us both better as individual people. But when I bring things up, you get angry and start blaming me for the way I say them, for how long it takes me to get to the point, and so on. By the time it’s over and i feel like we have concluded this, my heart is hurt. I feel weak and tired. I feel like I’m trying to make you and us more powerful and when I do that, I’m left as less. As my husband you are supposed to make me better and stronger and more creative because you love me. But I don’t feel that way right now. So when you ended with “I don’t know what to say”–I can’t tell you what to say. Why do you want me to tell you that? If in the end you can’t see that I love you and that’s why I brought this up and you want to tell me that you love me and are sorry for your role in any of this pain. Then I have to sit and get my strength back without you. Which makes me feel alone.