every time I try to fly
i fall
everytime i see your face
i crawl
It makes me want to run and hide.
And every time I hear your voice
I slip away inside.
and i
panic forever.
panic forever
over you.
panic forever
i want to be
all over you.
fantasies take away the heart
and numb the mind
they tear you apart.
The awful things resolve
themselves
the perfect things absolve
themselves
but your face–
fuck.
i want to be
over you.
why do you do this to me?
my friends can’t fix this
they don’t know how to fix
what they cannot see.
i can’t chill.
you’re so beautiful.
a thought returns to me
about how you looked on screen
but it’s only half of you
what exists is never real
because it wasn’t with me
and i
panic forever.
panic forever
over you.
panic forever
i want to be
all over you.
please don’t leave me
will you complete me?
please don’t lose me
will you stop depleting me?
i.
panic
forever.
i want to be–
over you.
(for henry cavill, circa 2008)
