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Poetry

I successfully laundered a billion dollars with todd hybels

I successfully laundered a billion dollars with todd hybels
through a megachurch in the northwest suburbs of south barrington.
more specifically south barrington, il
even MORE specifically willow creek community church
during what was supposed to be a beautiful god expansion
had the mob, deep state, and the papacy all over it
also the US government was involved.

so in case you wanted to know how we did it
we used quickbooks
like this:
extra tithing–
we upped the anti by 3.
cut fake checks
for more money
copied checks by 2.
it was fun to do.
hired fake contractors
and then the real ones took a cut–
and gave us work for free.
like trinity.
everything was donated
even me
i worked for free.

and NO ONE WAS THE WISER.
we were THAT awesome.